Shorty before the end, an outlook

Dinner for one up Kölsch is currently on TV! I am sitting in my armchair and think about whether I should take another IBU or whether it has to be a little stronger because Ralf Schmitz as a butler is outstanding and when I laugh it all hurts!

Which is among other things because of yesterday’s fall.
I visited a friend in Bergisch Gladbach yesterday. I parked in front of the house where she lives. She picked me up at the car. 5 meters in front of the entrance door I took up thrust and braked with my face in the banister. To be exact with my ears. These are now blue, the cheeks scraped and with a slight hematoma.
On the right side of my chest I have a nice hematoma. The clavicle is slightly bruised!   At the wrist two thick bruises, the left thumb is swollen and blue, right knee is bruised, blue and thick. Right ankle thick .
What I found remarkable, a nice passer-by of Indian or Pakistani origin, wanted to help me to stand on my feet. I wanted to explain the whole kinaesthetic to him, as I am not an elf. Unfortunately I was not able to intervene in this process. And so I stood on somewhat wobbly legs again. Which was too fast for me and I felt totally sorry for Claudia.

Arrived in the bathroom first check if the effzehjacket has got something off. Who knows me, knows that I don’t cheat here.
After a nice afternoon I went home and only then I saw the whole extent.
Together with the old healing stains I am motley! If there would be a review by the MDK now – we would have to swear some oaths.

Then this morning I had an experience that gives me an idea of what to expect.
That everything hurts me, was clear. On the edge of the bed the blood pressure was gone. Well, I can usually get that under control and 20 efortil drops later it was no longer a problem. I just couldn’t get on. I was not able to put one foot in front of the other. Totally stuck – even by shifting my weight nothing worked. Your brain works cognitively completely normal but on another level it refuses to work. And you’re always looking for a solution!
My sister then put me on the walker and drove me to the bathroom. She was really confident.  And just like yesterday when I fell I tried to bring kinaesthesia closer.
And it worked out well. I hope I can maintain this nurse mode in such situations. And also that despite the pain (and falling just hurts) I am still not afraid of it.
I don’t want to claim that I am going through all of this on the A… and I put it all away somehow. The opposite is the case – today, for example, I received my job reference and had to cry. Even many a fall is accompanied afterwards by angry, desperate or simply painful tears.
But I know that if I was afraid I wouldn’t go out at all and would already be in a wheelchair.

2020, it would be good if you would handle this differently than your predecessor.

You love people here: Come on in, here’s to a strong new year!




Help, I damage my own belongings!

So slowly there is no good and healthy cup, plate or glass in my household, I succeed with my poor fine motor skills and shaky hands to break everything, or to create a lot of messes or cracks. I don’t drink out of elegant glasses anymore – I am afraid that I will break them or knock my teeth out. Because when I take a swing with the glass, the drink often ends up rudely in my face, sometimes in my T-shirt, around my neck or behind me on the floor. That is the disadvantage of an independent life. When I make something to eat, I have to be careful, that the contents of the pan do not land next to the plate, when I stir something to keep the pot from flying off the stove… Handling hot things and knives requires the highest concentration! When I pour something into a cup, make sure that the contents do not land next to it.

Eating with knife and fork is only possible with simple things, like a steak. Do not do eat anything with bones. This would guarantee that the good piece would fly off the plate, and possibly land in the face of the person sitting next to it.

Loose pieces, which I bring to my mouth with my hand, can also be adventurous, because who knows if I will find my mouth. This can look especially interesting with cake pieces with icing sugar. 

A visit to a restaurant requires concentration, and what I order must be well planned. Preferably something in bite-sized pieces. So the choice does not depend on what I feel like, but on what I can eat with as little fuss as possible. And of course, no spills. Especially not spill it on myself. Order drinks, especially in simple glasses. Do not knock them over, and drink them as smoothly as possible. Preferably with both hands. All these movements should look as normal as possible. I can do this with great concentration, because if I act out, nobody will go out with me.

How everything looks like at home, only I know. Sometimes the food or drink lands on the floor and I curse and have to bend down all the time. Again and again a plate or cup breaks.

So I increasingly use plastic things – with all my love for the environment. I drink from plastic cups mainly for the reason not to hurt myself.

Clothing must also be well thought out. I know how I used to shake my head over bustiers. What kind of women are they who wear a love-killer like that? Now that opening and closing the bra is becoming increasingly difficult with the tiny fastenings, I understand. I don’t wear anything with buttons either, and zippers are also becoming increasingly difficult to grip. I prefer shoes to slip into, binding is also becoming problematic, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. Buttoning a blouse or shirt? Only if the buttons are the size of a plate. I know that even before I was diagnosed I had a weakness, so I buttoned the blouses in advance and then slipped in.

These are the disadvantages if you have mainly “motor symptoms”, my neurologist says my symptoms are mainly cerebellar. So as far as the cerebellum is concerned. Mostly fine motor skills, balance and speech.

How long I can keep my household running by myself is the question, but I definitely want to keep it running for a while. You also learn to find “another way”, and above all to do everything slowly.


At the end of the year I visited my father. Drive up to Budapest (the ones who doesn’t know, I am Hungarian-born), by Flixbus (at night) and then continue with my nephew by car. However, I was very exhausted, but I am good at “pinching my ass together”. Before that, I doped with painkillers,and an annoying lumbar spine attack came in.

My father is over 80, himself seriously ill, asthma and a lot more. He knows that I have “something” but he knows a “mild” version – what more do I want to offend to an old, sick man. He is worried enough as it is, but he hopes that I will soon go to the hospital and get the magic cure, that will repair everything. He should have that hope. I’m already worried, how long I can keep up this spectacle, because one day, he will see for himself. Or who knows how much longer I can visit him. 

But I got a taste of, what it’s like to be dependent on others. I don’t drive on the highway anymore, I used to drive the 1000 km with my BMW without any problems, now I can’t do that anymore. My nephew drove me everywhere without words and I had the support of friends too, but to ask every time, to get from A to B, I have to learn that. I am used to just sit in my car and spontaneously go somewhere. It is not like that anymore. I have to plan everything… nothing spontaneously.

In front of my family and friends I try to show the best version of myself, to protect and not to scare them. Everyone handles it differently. Some talk about it, ask questions, some keep quiet politely, it is also a question of mentality.

Only two years ago the last time,  I used to come for every Christmas and I used to cook for my dad in the traditional way. That’s over now. We also drove back for Christmas, my nephew of course wants to spend the holidays with his girlfriend. So it was a short trip, but at least I saw my people.

I visited my mother at the cemetery (she died in 2012, exactly on Christmas Eve, from lung cancer), but we always had a difficult relationship. I only asked her at the cemetery, why she didn’t make me “neat and clean”? 

Me as I was 2 years old. Was everything okay then?

The last day was emotional, a lot of things came up. To see where I once jumped as a child, skated, learned to ride a bike, went to school … Saying goodbye to my father and to my home was hard. How and when can I come back here and if? What will be next Christmas? 

And all the time the question: when and why did this start? To say with lyrics:

“Forgotten every day, forgotten every night
Where have I been? What have I done?
How did it start? When did it start?
Where have I been? What have I done?”

All in all, I am still doing „well”, it is difficult to strike a balance between optimism and reality. Even though, I know, that it will never be like before, I don’t concentrate on what is predicted.
At least I visited for Christmas my friend and her family, and went there by car, including the highway. So there you go. And I plan my next visit home by bus and down there to rent a car.

Being home is difficult. To see the place where I grew up, my family… now I have a picture of what it is like for people who have their home and family here – I can hide myself. I don’t have for that the support and comfort of my people, but as long as I can take care of myself it’s okay. To see all this makes me melancholic, sad. Again and again, I realize that psychologically it is much harder to cope with this as I thought. To express it again with a song text:

“Who knows?
My heart up and away,
I love life,
Life does not love me,

It tramples me underfoot,
And slaps me in the face.
I love the sun,
The sun does not love me,

Burns my soul,
The day without light”

However, only special people get hard ways – if is that any comfort. And now, on holidays and at the end of the year, we are allowed to be melancholy. Anyone can give easily up, so just put the crown in place, get up and keep walking…

Merry Christmas to everyone, and all the best for the New Year!

When it gets dark outside – and slippery

It’s here. The dark season and the first snow have also fallen, which makes life even more difficult for us. Orthopaedists and accident surgeons have a lot to do every winter, as soon as the first snow falls and it becomes icy, the number of broken bones rises sharply, which can be particularly devastating for us. Shoe spikes are one possibility (look up at Amazon for shoe spikes), the so-called anti-slip soles. They can be attached to any shoe and provide additional protection against slipping – they are only ugly. Especially older people and chronically ill people (we) often fall in winter and suffer serious injuries, from which they recover only with difficulty or not at all. 

People who use a walking stick know that the contact surface can be easily slippery, especially in winter and wet conditions. Spikes for the walking stick are available in stores, which are even paid for by the health insurance. 

A supply of vitamin D and a calcium-containing diet strengthens the bones, but I prefer to stay at home when it’s slippery! In our case, the healing will probably take longer, so don’t risk anything. 

Take care of yourselves and for everyone, a slippery and fall-free movement this winter!

What the dark season also manages: making me more inactive. In healthy years this time I liked to hang out at Christmas markets, go to the movies with popcorn and beer, go to the sauna or visit exhibitions. Of course, almost all of this could be realized with appropriate accompaniment and precautionary measures, but do I want that? Is that amusement or stress then? Rather at home, in front of the fireplace (if there is one) or in front of the TV with tea or cocoa instead of mulled wine, which I can’t tolerate any more.

This weather also makes me listless and sensitive. Otherwise in the year I was always busy and did balance exercises, went out with Nordic Walking poles, did my speech therapy exercises daily, swing exercises, yoga (as best I could). Now everything is too difficult for me. And the bad thing is, I’m not even sure that it’s seasonal. Is that why I think I’ve taken a step backwards? My balance is really limiting. 

But after the usual chores, everything is so hard for me and every atom of my body screams “Sit down, lie down” – or is it the “Little Asshole” who now lives and rules in my head? Every movement costs me conviction. I still live alone (which is good for me and I would like to keep this way for a while) and keeping my two-room apartment clean is suddenly exhausting. Vacuuming alone is like digging a ditch, and I have to sit down every few minutes. I wheeze and consider every little movement if it is necessary. Accordingly, my once spotlessly clean apartment suffers under this and everything becomes semi-clean… But by the time I have done these everyday things, that used to run along with it, like cleaning, shopping, washing, cooking, the day is also over, and it is especially hard for me to lift myself onto the treadmill or something like that.
In addition, I have appointments almost every day, physiotherapy, doctor’s appointments, speech therapy and others. Also that everything takes three times as long due to my poor fine motor skills.

What’s more, I am like an amphibian, with particularly low blood pressure when standing, with icy hands and feet, cold nose. 

How does all this affect my mood? Nobody wants to know that. Now it becomes important that I can no longer drink mulled wine, because I would like to get drunk and then go into deep winter sleep, and only wake up at Easter. Maybe a little later than that, we had already some snow to Eastern.

Of course you could say “Be thankful, that you can still do this and that”. But I am not thankful. I know that things will get worse, but I still hate that I can’t do “this and that” anymore, like a carefree walk in a fresh snow. Is that too much in ask?

Oh well, and we’re also careful not to bring an infection into the house!

So it remains to endure and to wait, that it remains a little longer brighter, that the dreaded snow chaos will be missing and that it goes a little uphill again with the weather, and the universe breathes into one life instead of these dark days. Yes, I have never been a friend of winter, in another life that time I have happily packed my suitcase and spent the holidays under palm trees.

What’s the news?

I wish you all a happy 1st Advent. ⭐️???⭐️

What’s the news?

The city of Bergheim is still not informed about the disabled parking lot and the KZVK about the company pension!

In addition, I have finished the LSTV therapy! Finally I would like to say almost, because it is really exhausting. So for people like me, who have also noticed for the first time how little resilience one has become after all.
So after such an hour LSVT, you shouldn’t bring another unit of physiotherapy behind you and then quickly get 2 more films for the Lomo Automat and a new mouse from Media Markt! Shortly before the car it can be that you make limp, fall down around you then times really hurt to do. Tested for you! Not recommendable!

But what is LSVT?
In the 2000s the Lee Silverman Voice Treatment was further developed to treat the Parkinson’s typical movement disorder (“Bradykinese”). This physio- and ergotherapeutic treatment method is called LSVT BIG. LSVT BIG focuses on the practice of large movement amplitudes.
I don’t have Parkinson’s now, but I wanted to try it anyway!
Both sides have to be aware of this. So it is also a challenge for LSVT and their therapists to get involved with the individual needs of MSA learners and to find additional exercises for their symptoms is their task!
Cognitively everything is ok but keeping the balance and becoming more dynamic in the movements is my challenge!
The exercises should be done every day and for me the safe stand is still the first priority.
My boss exercise !


Has it brought me anything?
In any case, even if it didn’t give the impression to some who saw me running in the last weeks in the evening! And also the fact that I fell down at least once a week doesn’t give a good impression A B E R I walked in the last week for the first time with the walking sticks, good 800 meters at a time (also a challenge for me from the coordination), slowly but steadily. I ate less Ibuprofen. When I put on socks and trousers it looks discreetly smoother! I’m better at climbing stairs.
The number needs a lot of self-discipline and of course I don’t know how much more I can get out of it and I had a really modest day last week but what remains for me.
On YouTube you can also find excerpts from the exercise sequence!

The LSVT concept is also available for speech therapy! = LSVT loud

Next week the THERA-Trainer leg and upper torso trainer tigo 530 will be available for 3 weeks! It is similar to the Motomed, which the Barmer doesn’t have in the pool.
I am curious!
And at all the effzeh has not lost against a nickelig playing Augsburg, bäh!
Come on effzeh ??⚪️


hello again,

I’ve been putting another blog entry off for weeks! On the one hand I never found the right words and on the other hand I fell into an emotional hole after I sent the last application because of the company pension. Now I’m still waiting for the notification.

It all started with After gastrointestinal infection and then it took me an eternity to catch up.
Running didn’t work out well, talking was extremely exhausting! But there were lots of tears especially when I arrived at my Powerselling in the photo equipment department! for the first time I realized that I am really sick and that my body does not start to obey me anymore. And that I would never set up the photo studio again. I remembered the portrait course of the photo school Cologne and the first meeting with Oli ? ! And what we have not all done to give a good picture, or not to get the full broadside of the teaching. Also brilliant, when I borrowed the Stuadioblitzanlage from Foto Gregor and the complete Stüttgenhof was in the dark when I switched everything on together.
A drastic experience! The portrait course was followed by other courses. I consider whether I should try one more time! Maybe another reportage?
But whatever I do, nothing will be the same as it was a few months ago. The whole thing was made more difficult by the 1st anniversary of my last working day. October 16th: I came to the regular service, entered the station and there he was away the pressure. Now just sit down well, wait for the handover and don’t let anything show, and somehow get to the Effortil bottle, that was my plan.
It didn’t quite work out. Somebody noticed that I had less color on my face than the patient. 63/39 mmHg measured 57/34 mmHg. The doc tried to place a Viggo (needle). What remained was an edema, a pressure of 73/41 mmHg. And the instruction to go home and have me put on sick leave. Hahahahaha, first find who when your neurologist thinks you’re simulating and the appointment for your new neurologist is not until December. That was my last working day, which was not very praiseworthy. You imagine a last day differently, don’t you?
I feel like I’ve been put off with ROT and I don’t belong to the squad anymore!
You need a task. I have enough ideas, but I just doubt whether I can implement them! What I learned once is still there. At least I think so. I can follow the two at the next table when they talk about their work in some intensive care unit in Cologne!
Oh, and I recognize Erich Rutemöller as he walks past me to the exit. Wants to call after him: Save my club! The inclined football fan knows what I’m writing about.
Well, I still have some packages to pack. But at some point, you can’t see the page where the center left is: for online franking.

I also have lots of flashbacks:
Sings Shakira: hips don’t lie, see Henning swing his hips!
When I adjusted my skis (1 week skiing), I thought winter holidays could be nice if you don’t fight with your ex-boyfriend every day! The skis look like new! But the water is my element, it has always been more mine than the mountains!
When I hear the elephant song ( such a shame ) by Talk Talk, I have to think of my brother-in-law.
Another Day in Paradise and the mosquito bites of Mauritius ??? Itching again
I think I should pay, the Cottas has 80/90’s day!

And I have to go to LVST therapy at the university. Today is the 3rd round, I also see why the exercises are as they are, but Holly shit is that exhausting.
Today the 3 additional exercises were added, the therapist said something more demanding and my thighs are still burning!

To be continued


Travel tips from Joshua from Australia

These are travel tips from Joshua Lee Calvert. Thanks for that and the permission to publish it here. These are all useful tips, and it also motivates you to do as much as you can, with MSA. Are you missing anything useful? Write in the comments!
On a trip to UK Dubrovnik, Barcelona, Edinburgh, Glasgow, Wick.

MSA does come with you too sorry but it’s free!! Bloody bastard!! Wish it didn’t, but guess what, it’s always with you, at home too.

So if you have been putting off a trip you can do it but must plan and be prepared to pull out at anytime if too unwell that’s why insurance is so important.

I booked the whole trip myself as I have always done as it’s much cheaper.

You should get blessings from Dr.  including letter stating fit to travel.

Dr must also write a letter for all meds that you take.

You need to arrange enough meds for entire stay.

It’s definitely difficult but can be done: You must check/get insurance before you book trip.

***Insurance will require to state you have MSA.
****Answer all questions honestly because otherwise if you don’t it will be invalid. For me, with checking the boxes, stating I have swallowing issues use wheelchair etc. It cost about 250 AUD for 5 weeks.

***Tip- Book flights and assistance at all airports!!!! Which means they wheelchair you through all gates immigration etc. Your family members also come with you.
Advantages – You get through faster and get on plane first.
Disadvantages – You get off plane last, because they have wheelchair there waiting for you!!

Book accommodation Airbnb,, using filters to choose accessible features that meet your needs.

Get place with view garden etc because if you get sick or have to spend the whole time at home you can do so in comfort. This is usually cheaper than hotels.

Choosing to stay in homes apartments flats etc. because you can use kitchen, wash clothes unlimited. WiFi. Netflix. etc. and above all you can stay in if too unwell

Trips on bus in UK mostly free because in wheelchair.

If you need help private message me.

So travel can be stressful at the best of times let alone having multiple system atrophy.

Tip 1
when planning your trip think about the weather
Plan your holiday for the cooler months if this is your preference, if you like the heat plan it for the heat.

Tip 2
if you plan for the cooler months or on the cusp of the seasons then the trip is going to be cheaper !! For most of us, heat is a big factor so you need to have a place that has air conditioning.
If you find yourself in the heat, take a break go to a restaurant go to a place where there is air conditioning, rest take fluids and if no better, go home.
We must listen to our bodies

Tip 3
Ask yourself what are your expectations of this trip?
Is this trip for you?
Or are you going on a trip for your family?
**** Either way this is no different than before MSA.
However remember throughtout life expectations change and we always need to compromise.

Tip 4
The percentage rule – ok here it is.
This is something to apply with your life now especially with MSA.
Don’t just focus on the bad 50%, 9%, or 1% of life. When you look through the lens like that, it is terrible.
Our lives are our own!!
As Nelson Mandela said
” Life is a struggle”
So this is the same for everyone not just us with MSA.
So try and tell the story from the positive side of things
If you can’t go out for 2 days on the trip don’t just focus on that.
When people ask how was the trip, you have to find the things, you enjoyed, the people you met, the food you ate etc.
In other words, give the good part of life/ holiday 30% 50%, 70% etc.  it is fair assessment and a voice too.
Surprisingly, when you start to look at life like, that it is better. Holidays are like privileges, so for me if I can go anywhere I take it.
I can’t drive and spend day to day at home, so I enjoy just soaking up the place. I’m holidaying in.

Tip 5
Don’t worry about the upcoming trip! Worry is a waste of time and a negative emotion. Do some good research contact properties and ask questions.
I also use Street View to look around the area, the streets access, etc.
Once you have booked, look forward to it, don’t worry or it will become a self fulfilling prophecy. Back your research and preparations and think positive.
So preparation is the key.

Tip 6
Be prepared to abandon the trip, if too sick or you are acutely unwell.
That’s why insurance is so necessary,

Tip 7
Transport, Look up transport options available at destination.
Can you hire a power chair or scooter. What is the public transport like?
How do you access it?
For eg. in New York you can get an app and book Taxis, direct even when out and about. They get your GPS location and the cab picks you up from there.
In London people in wheelchairs don’t pay for public transport eg. bus.
Rent a car/ wheelchair access.

Tip 8
Attractions, concerts etc.
See if you or the companion dog, wife, husband are able to accompany you, for free. For Example on the London eye, I had to pay, but my wife got on for free, to look after me, so we only paid for 2 people.

Tip 9
Check out health facilities where you are going. I would not recommend you travel to, for example places of war or go on a boat trip where it might take 10 hours to motor back to port.

Tip 10
Take antibiotics 2 kinds. Ask Dr to give you a broad spectrum antibiotic to cover infections other than a Urinary Tract Infections -UTI. For example cephelex.Then get one specifically for a UTI eg. Trimethoprim.
Take anti nausea medications and something for sleep.

Tip 11
Take enough incontinence pads, VC catheters, enemas,
suppositories etc.

Tip 12
Stay calm. Remember you have good and bad days at home too.
So if you have one on holidays that’s normal.
Take it easy, communicate with your family caregivers, etc. tell them what you are feeling, see if they can suggest anything. Do what you would normally do at home.
Hopefully it passed, like usual, or you may need to adjust your plans.

**** Planes – Always book assistance with your trip!! ****
Even if walking normally, get wheelchair assistance at airport, for all flights both, departure and arrivals.
Stress, fatigue, etc. affects us badly and you don’t want to ruin your trip before it begins!!
This is especially important, for the gates immigration checks, etc. as they can often be a very long way away and very time consuming to get there.
For eg. LA after 23 hours on the plane a 30-40 min. walk to gate then a bus etc. for connecting flights, will be impossible. By getting assistance they will push you to gate. You will get through security and border checks as a priority so will anyone else accompanying you. You get on plane first but usually get off last. You need to get wheelchair approved, by airline before you fly. Wheelchairs are free, to transport however sometimes their are weight limits, like MSA, the airlines are all different. Fly business if you can!!
Did it once but got it free from family member.
Also when you book with assistance, they sometimes give you more luggage allowance and you get to sit close to front of plane and near toilet.

Wear compression stockings  – These will help prevent deep vein thrombosis and if you wear full legs and or abdominal binder, will help orthostatic hypotension.

Do exercises in your seat and get up move, regularly if you can.
I calculated, I have done 6 23 hour,  plus flights in 2 years plus 4 other 6 hour, plus flights and 4 3 hour flights.
When you arrive, you will /can have more pain swollen legs etc.
That’s why wheelchair assistance is great and a necessity even if you normally can ambulate.
*** Don’t waste energy at airports***

More tips to come as always message me any questions

We don’t have a locker anymore.

After I had given something like a walkout, I had to deal with the locker, my locker. No. 24! I was born on a 24th and so I thought it was a good omen at that time 😉 The Christmas tree sticker was also on it at that time!

They stuck on the outside!

I started my Hohenlind era with an early shift and was really nervous. Among other things because I was a specialist nurse who had not completed her further training in these sacred halls and the then boss said at the interview: “With specialist personnel from outside we have always had our difficulties, they never stayed long”. yes, Hohenlind had an elitist reputation! 🙂 Years later we celebrated Weiberfastnacht at the EVK and of course you will be asked where you work. The reaction was not always good. 😉 Meanwhile this has hopefully settled itself.

I thought to move it to the night service first, so to speak about hustle and bustle and so on. But then the boss let go a call for help, in the sense of spin emergency.

And since I had already learned that I would retire at the end of the month, I went there on Sunday. Open, like a real pensioner. In the luggage also some Haribo, because I always liked to have something to nibble in the service. You never know what will happen.

Of course there was still talk about God and the world, so that I came only shortly before 20.00 o’clock to clear out. From the quantity which I had in the locker it went! Nah, really! Only my pen box was full. I somehow had a long-term study going on which pens were the most suitable.

1 rain jacket (from the 7th Cologne Marathon, I was a helper in the massage tent), umbrella

2 pairs of replacement trunks (always in coloured) and underwear, 1 T-shirt, deodorant

Instructions for use from Picco and AVL, 2 small Vibrax devices, 2 complete blanks on intensive care diaries

1 Stethoscope

1 pair of Crocs colorful and with footballs on it . Of course!

My key chain and flashlight, I also have one as Darth Vader! 😉

On my name tag was always Sr. Marion, never before and surname, there I am Oldschool. Even if then patients introduced themselves with their first name as well. Isch bin dr Willi 🙂 I am a nurse. I was and have been it gladly. I have learned the basic care with water and not with Washmitts (even if they are great for the Cologne wipe). Washmitts are moist towels for body care, which can also be heated in the microwave. If I continue writing now, I will come to the online care courses and then I get upset again.

Of course I fell into the arms of the night shift and couldn’t suppress a few tears. I’m sorry Alex that it has already caught you again.

But I have decided when I have everything through, I want to work something on 450 euros basis. So who has ideas… 😉

When I turned the key one last time, it sounded so damn empty.

I wish the new owner of the 24 all the best and lots of fun!


The new Luigi!

Since one week you are now with me and even if you are missing something here and there, you are still a highlight!

It was a Thursday when we took you out of the pot into the Rhineland ? and even the sun was shining!

At 12:30 Marga , Melanie and Marion with Elliot and Frl Wanda (also called Mäuschen) left for Dinslaken! Elliot and the Fräulein (your sign Franz. Bullies) were very excited, he was always trying to look out of the window. The lady tried to find the right position on her lap!
After a good hour we arrived and started looking for Mr. G., from whom we should take you over!

You stood a little lost in the corner! But already when you got your two stamps, with the magic letters FC, your red shone!

First we went to the gas station, you don’t get far with 200 ml of fuel. Once fill up, the Bordnavi explains itself and off on the motorway.
But already after 15 min you discuss with the mentioned navigation device. The thing says that it has found a 14 min shorter distance! After the 5th message you press yes and 10 minutes later you are in a traffic jam! Oh great! But ideal to open the roof! Here and there times on a button press and look what happens!


The Navi sent me deep to the Niederrhein to Mönchengladbach, that went too far for me then nevertheless and with the next A61 direction Koblenz sign, I have taken over the command!

First arrived there was a Hennes for the hat shelf, a pair of soccer shoes for the rear view mirror, a Christophorus!
What is still missing? A #effzeh sticker and another license plate holder, where only the lower part is changed.

On top of that we two have a lot of fun together and do a lot of nice tours!

Everything is “a little” different…

I am now more than a week in Canada and try to see and experience as much as I can.

The first week I enjoyed at home from my cousin, where we talked a lot – good speech therapy exercise for me, by the way. And besides at home we tried to clear me of a constipation, which took almost a week and was pretty persistent…

We visited the mountains, no, I didn’t meet bears but vineyards. We had tasty foods and drinks, vine too,, among other things in a “Bavarian Restaurant”, which I found funny, but wine is more tasty here than beer. Wee did many other things, especially to visit my other family members.  My other cousin did a big yummie B&Q and I met all family members which I enjoyed a lot.  I’ve also got homegrown grapes, peaches, pears and plums.

My sweet cousin looks after me very carefully, you could say she is more afraid for me than I am, but I know that for the outsider everything looks much more scary than I perceive.

Now I’m in Tofino, and I’m thrilled by the beauty of the island and the ocean. I have 3 days left here, so a lot can still happen. But I ate the best smoked salmon of my life (self-smoked) and not out of plastic and supermarket and not from a fish farm. I also have a wonderful trip on a boat with the best local tour guide who lives on one of the islands. Admittedly the boarding and alighting was not very elegant, actually not at all. It is so difficult, because “in my head” I imagine everything so easy. Get into a boat? I’ve done it so many times before. And then I stand there like petrified, two people talk at me and offer all kinds of help, and I am horribly in a terrible position. Frustrating.


Some impressions of Tofino

Unfortunately I am not so lucky with whales, I would have liked to do a “whale watching tour”, but the whales have moved…

We visited the famous floating garden (Freedom Cove), I stayed on the boat, because when I get off once, who knows how long it will take, to get me back in again. There were older gentlemen, easily 10-15 years older than me, who sporty visited this beautiful garden on the sea, photographed the owners, full with questions, chatted happily, and I was a bunch of misery, who didn’t dare to leave the boat. I don’t look like a sick person, especially when sitting and without a walking aid (and I prefer not to use any one if possible), who has all sorts of weaknesses . That is also frustrating.

The impressive floating garden in the ocean

Food is a topic – I want to eat something that  embarrass me in a public and I don’t want to choke.

Seeing all the surf shops, is not better. Not long ago, they were the place where I used to spend my money. I sold my surf equipment and my 3 wetsuits in this summer. When I see the boys and girls riding around on their bikes in wetsuits, I think “shit” again.


But I am so glad to have come here to see this beauty, I am very grateful to my cousin Valene because without her I would not be able to do the whole trip. And I have to thank to her friends for supporting me, especially Keith, who is a native of the island, for his time and a wondeful boat trip.

Our “gingerbread house” – fairytale accommodation

Do so many things, as much as you can, because we don’t know what tomorrow will bring.