I had this idea from the beginning. There is a small, ugly and malicious creature sitting in my head, randomly switching off the light, from time to time. And I wake up with a new symptom. And then it remains to be hoped that he turns the light on again – but he doesn’t always do that. And then he grins maliciously. He really enjoys dealing with me, like with a Woodoo doll.
Now, whether we like it or not, we are permanently connected.
The easiest thing for him is when I lie down and do nothing. Then he switches and rules in my head. But when I get up and do something, balance exercises, my exercises from the speech therapist or I just walk out, then he is quiet. My only way to annoy him, to get my way when I do something.
Sometimes, when I don’t feel like it and my butt is stuck to the couch, I hear the little asshole whispering to me: “Stay seated! Relax! Get some rest! After all, you’re sick.” And then he can do his work. Like the snake in the Jungle Book:”Truuuuuust meeeee”. When laziness and my “inner pig” gets me, I ask, what would he want right now? He would love it if I stayed on the couch, I could see him nodding.
No, I don’t want him to enjoy – so I get up.
If I wasn’t so weak in my fine motor skills, I’d draw him. So that the thing gets a face. And I know who lives in my head.
Does he need another name? I would say “Little Asshole” is enough and suits him. I am open for suggestions!
Photo: es_seen / Photocase